Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze

Dudes, I want to apologize for posting this late. I was out having a radical time at the Otakon convention for the first time that I was not near a computer for a good majority of the day. But enough about that, you’re probably wondering what I thought of the tubular 1991 sequel, “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze.” Well, I didn’t know that they had made a sequel to the movie until I was 11 when I was over a friend’s house and he showed me the movie. I only got to see the first half of the movie and didn’t get to finish it until the next year when we got cable and the movies were on the movie channels a lot. Here’s what I thought of it:

Traditionalists will complain that the Turtles fight less, goof off more and distant too far from their beloved sewers. However, for other people these are explicit improvements, just like the more varied settings, changing the actress of April O’Neil to Paige Turco, David Warner as Professor Jordan Perry, an actor that parents will be able to recognize, and how the Turtles fight scenes that look like playful dance sequences, which they essentially are. If the Turtles maintain on being a mainstream box-office movie, at least they now have the courtesy to make a mainstream movie.

There is a reasonable argument that Michelangelo (puppetry done by Mak Wilson and Michelan Sisti, voiced by Robbie Rist), Donatello (puppetry done by Rob Mills and Leif Tilden, voiced by Adam Carl), Raphael (puppetry done by David Greenaway and Kenn Troum, voiced by Laurie Faso), and Leonardo (puppetry done by Robert Tygner and Mark Caso, voiced by Brian Tochi) represent everything that has messed up Western civilization. It begins with the Turtles’ fascination with junk food, moves on to the delight they take in gathering big tabloid headlines, and ends with the fact that they were given names from a Renaissance art book that their mentor Splinter (puppetry done by Rickey Boyd, Kevin Clash and Sue Dacre, voiced by Kevin Clash), the world’s most famous man-sized rat, one found in a gutter.

Janet Maslin of the New York Times said in her review of this film, “Of course, these streaks of adolescent anarchy are also what make the Turtles so bodacious, as they themselves might put it, and such irresistible role models for anyone too small to know better.” Capitalizing on their own greatest qualities, the Turtles this time also throw in rap music (done very poorly by the dumb rapper Vanilla Ice), references to pop celebrities like Arnold Schwarzenegger, a complicated disco kung fu sequence, and a friendly nod to the competition. Maslin commented in her review, “Bart Simpson's likeness is seen on a glass filled with a foul-smelling antidote to toxic waste.”

Dedicated to the memory of the great Jim Henson, this film shows that the Turtles are still staying in April’s apartment. Like everything else in this second installment, April looks better, largely due to the fact that she is portrayed by a different actress and makes no attempt to look like the previous actress. Maslin noted in her review, “The audience, however avid, is not expected to have much of an attention span.”

April is still friendly and forgiving, but her patience is being tired by the skateboards, comic books, pizza cartons and other accumulation scattered around her apartment by these fun-loving turtles. “The is the cleanest one,” she moans, thinking of Splinter, who also moved in. Maslin stated in her review, “Whiskery and damp-eyed as ever, he is the one exception to the now-looks-better rule.”

This story, written by Todd W. Langen and directed by Michael Pressman, takes the Turtles back to their roots, which is the ooze. When April reports on an attempt to move a toxic landfill, she accidentally bumps into the same ooze (look at the subtitle) that turned the Turtles from small green pets to world-famous movie stars, and onto the part that this ooze is given to Shredder (played by François Chau, but voiced by David McCharen), practically invisible inside the same metal helmet with shingles, the Turtles’ main enemy.

These developments, which have the predictable effect of making the Turtles fighting furious, also make them thoughtful. It’s depressing, one tells Splinter, to think their special powers are no more magical than the substance of the canister. "Do not confuse your origins with your present worth," advises Splinter, sounding very much like Mr. Miyagi. Regardless of what the people might think of his syntax, you can see a reasonable message.

The Turtles, when not fighting the Shredder or giving Vanilla Ice the subject of his rap song, joke around in very enjoyable ways. They clean April’s apartment while doing a dance number; they talk in football huddles; they try out new words (“Ec-lectic!”) to replace the traditional Turtle saying, for those who don’t know, it’s “Cowabunga!” Anyone who did not know that will probably not care to find out in this movie.

Also in this film are two monstrous villains known as Tokka (puppetry done by Kurt Bryant and Rick Lyon, voiced by Frank Welker) and Rahzar (puppetry done by Mark Ginther and Gord Robertson, voiced by Frank Welker), who were at first respectively a snapping turtle and wolf. I watched both the Nostalgia Critic and Angry Video Game Nerd's review on the Ninja Turtles movies, and they both called Tokka and Rahzar Bebop and Rocksteady. I understand they were attached to the cartoon series, but when I saw this movie, I kept calling them Tokka and Rahzar because I also played the video games a lot. On the human side of the tale, Ernie Reyes Jr. does well as a pizza delivery boy whose job is the film’s karate kid. Professional wrestler Kevin Nash plays Super Shredder and Toshishiro Obata reprises his role as Tatsu. They can undeniably be found at the toy store as well as the big screen.

Despite the fact that the violence was toned down, the Turtles not saying “darn” (I’m using the replacement word), and not being as good as the first, this sequel is still enjoyable to watch if you embrace the inner child in you. Like how “Batman Forever” became more child-friendly, this film did the same thing. If you liked the first one, give this one a chance because you should say that this film will be enjoyable, through the eyes of a child.

You want to know how the third film in the live-action series was? Stay tuned next week to find out dudes.