Spy Kids: Armageddon

Tonight, I checked out “Spy Kids: Armageddon,” which came out on Netflix last month. As all of you may remember, I have not been a fan of the past couple of sequels. How is this one compared to the previous ones?

It’s been almost fifteen years since there was a new “Spy Kids” sequel and one of the last times Robert Rodriguez released a film theatrically (he’s been releasing them on Netflix). Sadly, these days Robert Rodriguez seems more focused on making low-budget kids available entertainment more than anything else, and “Spy Kids: Armageddon” lets him accomplish both of those. Not only is he able to continue his streak of average family films, but he also gets to resurrect his long quiet action franchise for a new generation.

And the results are particularly a mixed film.

Siblings Patty (Everly Carganilla) and Tony Torrez (Connor Esterson) are the children of Nora (Gina Rodriguez) and Terrence (Zachary Levi), two of the world’s greatest secret agents. After they unknowingly help powerful game developer Rey Kingston, played by Billy Magnussen, unleash a worldwide computer virus that gives him control of all technology, Patty and Tony train to become spies themselves to save their now-captured parents, as well as rescue the world from living under Rey’s unending video game.

Felix Vasquez said in his review, “It’s pretty clear by now that Rodriguez isn’t making his movies for all audiences, as he’s aiming mainly for the streaming audiences between the ages of 8-11. And it shows as he co-writes the movie with his son Racer Rodriguez. That’s both a pro and a con, as while Rodriguez has insight in to the younger mind set, the movie often sounds like it was written by a twelve year old. The dialogue is often stagnant and you can just feel the actors trying to force out clumsy interplay and attempts to muster up tension. As I mentioned, so much of “Spy Kids: Armageddon” is a mixed bag. There’s so much to like about the movie, but there’s also so much that keeps it from reaching the bar that the original trio of movies set.”

Vasquez continued, “So much of the plot feels old hat and recycled from previous films. We’ve seen so much of these plot elements and spy gags before and to a better degree with the goofy weaponry—correction: “Gadgets,” as well as the obligatory robot sidekick. There’s also the villain who is a rotten master gamer, which we pretty much saw in “Spy Kids 3D.” Despite Magnussen's threatening in his way, Stallone just did it better. Also, Rodriguez is a fan of the same boring story. It’s always a rich family that takes on a bad guy who is usually a grumpy, juvenile man who is always evil because of some past grudge toward the spy family or just kids in general.

Vasquez pointed out, “Rodriguez has yet to explore the out of the ordinary family. There are families out there with one parent, mixed race parents, interfaith parents, and often kids can be raised by their aunts and uncles, or grandparents. I’d love to see Rodriguez spotlight a family where the kids realize that their grandfather who raised them is a world famous spy like James Bond or something. The whole sense of self awareness is also completely gone, in favor of more sugary wholesomeness that does everything to evade any sense of danger.” The original film had Danny Trejo training the kids, and now it is computers.

Vasquez ended his review by saying, “That said, the special effects are neat, and I enjoyed a lot of the goofy monsters and robots that Rodriguez hurls at us at almost lightning fast speeds. His monsters and villains tend to be pretty inventive all things considered. It’s pretty obvious “Spy Kids: Armageddon” just isn’t meant for me, but in the end it’s not Rodriguez’s worst film. I just wish he’d retire the formula and start thinking of introducing different kinds of families he can expose his young audience to. It’s a big world out there.”

As you may have guessed, this isn’t as good as the first movie. However, compared to some of the sequels in the franchise, this one is better. However, that’s not to say that this is a good movie. This is just an average sequel. Not good, but not bad, just ok. I don’t think it would hurt to see this, but you might already be able to guess the plot points and cliches early on. Especially when the resolution at the end makes you just say, “Well, of course.” However, I still like the training montages and the action scenes. Even though the story is borrowed heavily from the first and third movies, it still won’t hurt to see it. Check it out and see it for yourself.

Thank you for reading my blog tonight. Stay tuned tomorrow for the continuation of “Halloween Month 2023.”