Moulin Rouge!

Well, it's Valentine's Day again. That means I have to review another movie that I hate but everyone else seems to love. Today I will look at the 2001 musical, "Moulin Rouge!" Have I ever reviewed a musical before? I remember I did review "The Prince of Egypt," which is a children's animated musical, but I guess that will count. Anyway, before everyone starts sending their hate mail to not bash on "Moulin Rouge!" please hear me out first.

Goodness do I hate this movie. It's right up there with "Titanic" in my list of least favorite movies. You know those films that think they are saying something new and innovative but it has been said countless times before and in better ways? This is one of those movies. The message is: "Follow your heart and be in love." However, they think by putting together all of these huge effects, musical numbers and recycling songs that we have heard covers for so many times before sung badly is somehow making this new. IT'S NOT!!!!!

Much like with James Cameron's highest grossing movie of all time, "Avatar," I really love the idea behind the movie's style and I love the sets. Doug Walker thought he was going to love this movie, thinking that it was going to be a live-action music video with this really good story because "the director, Baz Luhrmann, couldn't have put all this money and artistic direction" into a nonsensical version of "Titanic." That's "exactly" what this movie is, "Titanic." For as much as I hate "Titanic," I will say that it had something better to offer the viewers than "Moulin Rouge!" because that had a true story about the real-life sinking of the RMS Titanic. Also, I give Cameron credit for putting a little bit of history in "Titanic," even though some of it was not accurate, but what movie that has been about a historic story has been 100% accurate?

Before this movie came out, movie musicals were not seen as much. Even today, they rarely are released. "Moulin Rouge!" is the first musical to have a huge budget behind it to come out in years. You want to know the downside of this: NO ORIGINAL SONGS!! Actually, they have had one or two original songs, if I remember correctly. Mainly the soundtrack was songs that we have heard covers to before in something like "American Idol" or any of those talent shows. Maybe that was the style this movie was going for. It was showing the viewers the whole array of music in this one place the movie is taking place. I don't think that works effectively though. For this to be the first musical to come out in years and have no original songs would be a huge slap in the face for people who are fans of musicals and were looking forward to something new and original. A lot of them were redone and sung really badly. Very few actually worked. I do understand that was the movie's style and I like that this movie started up movie musicals again.

Another problem I have with this movie, besides it being "Titanic" all over again, is the basic story. The villain, played by Richard Roxburgh, has no motivation but to be a jerk and get what he wants because that's what he is used to is boring. Christian, played by Ewan McGregor, is the protagonist who wants to learn about love but has never been in love, so he wants to explore about it, and he’s boring. Satine, played by Nicole Kidman, is someone who wants to be an actress because that's her biggest desire. When Harold Zidler, played by Jim Broadbent, takes her out during her big performance and says to her, "And then you will become..." and Satine replies, "A real actress." My reply to this is, "Satine, you're flying in the air, doing somersaults, flips, you're singing, and your fans are praising you as a goddess. What more do you want!? You have the whole world at your fingertips and you want to be a real actress!?" So she's boring.

When you find out that she has tuberculosis, because in the beginning she is coughing and falls off the gymnastics prop, and we think that she is dead. DougWalker says that part is a bad version of "La bohème." When Satine is told that the Duke wants Christian dead, SHE DOESN'T TELL HIM!! Why doesn't she tell the Duke that she has tuberculosis, which will make him break up with her? Why doesn't she tell Christian to pull a "Romeo & Juliet," and just run out of town? Instead, she says to him, "I can't see you anymore." I hate those parts in any romance because the couple goes off and pout and brood and think they aren't in love with one another because of some misunderstanding and they think they hate each other. How is this resolved? By playing a pop song, of course! THIS IS BORING! WE KNOW THEY ARE GOING TO GET BACK TOGETHER!!! STOP WASTING OUR TIME!!! For the style and money that was put into this movie, it was wasting our time, but from what I think, it looks like it's going to give us something new. However, in terms of character, story, or anything else; it's not giving us anything new. Right down to the music, it's recycled. You could say that this is literally the exact same music.

I couldn't get into this style because the editing was too fast. These are massive, big sets. I want to see every single one of them! You're not because different characters come up in front of the camera and does something the entire run time of this movie. Why are you going to spend all this money on costumes and sets if you're not going to let us see them? You're instead going to cut away or move the camera around!

Doug Walker says that the pretentiousness is what gets to him the most, and I would agree with him on that. Have you counted how many times they use "love" in this movie? I think this movie wins the award for using "love" the most in movie history. Unbelievable!

The characters all are children, maybe written for children. The movie thinks it's the biggest thing! It thinks it says, "All you need is love." That is not a very interesting message. Even if you do believe that message, there's much more than that. THERE'S LIFE! THAT GETS IN THE WAY!!! Maybe this movie was trying to show that, but what they were showing that gets in the way isn't life, it was planned movie nonsense with the villain, the comedic misunderstanding, and so on. That's movie folks, not life. The movie must have thought that life is getting in the way of love, but love will shine through because it conquers all, but it simply wasn't. I agree with Doug Walker when he says that it was "very contrived and forced." The movie thought it was giving us something grand and new and big, but gave us style over substance. Maybe the movie was thinking it wasn't that. What I mean is that movie sort of becomes its own entity and art form. I think the movie was trying to get across something really big and groundbreaking, but it's just nonsense that we have seen so many times before! I was annoyed the entire time I was watching this.

People seem to really love this one and really get into the love story, but I don't understand it. However, people who say they love this movie usually say that they love the art direction and style of the movie, similar to "Avatar," which people say they only like that for the look of the movie. To tell you the truth, I can understand and respect that. If you like the message in this movie, then live that life. Live with the whole "love conquers all" message because it's a wonderful thought for children. I can't do that because it doesn't work for me, personally.

Remember, if you like this movie, I will not judge you. I won't act like I know what the director was thinking because I have no idea what any director thinks when they make a movie. We all have movies that we hate but everyone loves and vice versa. Just remember it's all about taste, not that it makes you a good or bad person.

Happy Valentine's Day to all the couples in the world, but for single people, like myself, I say Happy Single Awareness Day. Stay tuned tomorrow for the second entry in my "Black History Month Movie Reviews."