Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning

To recap on this franchise, the first “Universal Soldier” was basically the height of Dolph Lundgren, the middle of Jean-Claude Van Damme’s career, and the beginning of director Roland Emmerich’s rise to Hollywood fame. Nick Langdon said in his review, “That an openly gay German man would come to define the most American and heteronormative of genres, the blockbuster action movie, isn't something anyone saw coming, but he kept churning out the hits, and in Tinseltown that's all that matters.” What the first film was never meant to do though was launch the franchise, and none of the subsequent tries to try and make this happen, the 1999 theatrical sequel, two TV movies or the 2009 direct-to-video sequel, made any impact. Langdon mentioned, “So twenty years after the fact Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning is a quasi-sequel/reboot to the 2009 film, but it's honestly not worth getting into the lore of this, there's better uses for your grey matter than asking why these super soldiers are super slaughtering one another. Yeah yeah, conspiracy, plot twists, all the usual stuff. I really couldn't get involved in any of this. I just kept wishing I was watching Stargate (1994) instead. Ah now Kurt Russell, there's a real super soldier, as anyone who has seen the 1998 movie Soldier can attest.”

This 2012 film was directed by John Hyams, son of Peter Hyams, the genius behind genre-hopping, dark cinematography and a great track record with JCVD (he was behind both “Timecop” and “Sudden Death”). Langdon noted, “However John lacks his old man's keen eye for light and shadow, even though he does at least try for a look we could probably dub "Eli Roth attempts Gaspar Noé on a Steven Seagal budget". The action is pretty good, suitably OTT and bloody, but there's still too much cutting, and having just watched an action movie masterclass from some of the all time greats, well the flaws here were even more evident than they otherwise would have been. Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning was, somewhat bizarrely released first direct to video, but then later got a theatrical release. Now I'm not a highly paid Hollywood bigshot, but that sounds arse backwards to me. I was recently praising Scott Adkins for his role in John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023), and saying he needed more work. So yeah, I still mean that, but not like this. He's a funny guy who can go big, but this mopey lead role does not suit his limited range.” Give him a few one linters and have him fight, don’t make him deal with two hours of heavy drama. The movie also needed far more Van Damme and Lundgren, as they’re the only two people with real screen presence, but they’re not in it that much.

Another flaw of this film is that it fills up a lot of time wasting with boring shots of cars driving, people walking around, and staring in long silence at certain locations. They try and do the part from “Robocop” when Murphy goes back to his old house, but it’s not as good. Langdon said, “Can you believe in 2012 that screenwriters still thought the "book of matches from a bar that was found next to a dead body provides the next clue" was in anyway still acceptable, yet here it is. Then later there's a scare in the bathroom mirror as well as a stripper with a heart of gold. I'm honestly surprised at one point someone wasn't startled when a cat leapt out of some bins in an alley with a stock miaowing sound effect added in post. Speaking of Robocop, now that's a violent film, but there's a joy to it as well, in part due to it's wry satire on America the Reagan years. it's as horrifying as it is awesome. The violence in Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning is just deeply unpleasant, it's not thrilling or inventive, it's just relentless and dour. This feels less like an action movie and more one of those War on Terror-era torture porn horror flicks. If the first Universal Soldier was one of the last post-Vietnam War films, then this is very much stuck in the worst parts of Bush/Obama era.” Time for this franchise to face a reckoning and die without hope of another sequel.

This film did kill the franchise, thankfully. There has been talk about Todd Black and Jason Blumenthal hiring Richard Wenk to write a reboot in October 2018, focusing on one resurrected soldier, but nothing has been officially announced. Just do yourself a favor and never watch any of the sequels. None of them are good, but feels like a giant waste of time. Honestly, I think the lead actors did a much better job in “Expendables 2,” which was also released that year. I’m sorry to have to end this month off by just reviewing horrible sequels after a decent first film, but that’s just how it goes sometimes. That’s exactly what happened with “The Scorpion King” franchise.

Alright everyone, we have thankfully ended of “Universal Soldier Month.” I know it was quite a long run to sit through, seeing how the sequels were all terrible, in my opinion, but I don’t know what others would think. Stay tuned next month for more excitement.